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Youth/Young Adult Teacher's Manual



[1]And Abraham was old, and well stricken in age: and the LORD had blessed Abraham in all things.

[2]And Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house, that ruled over all that he had, Put, I pray thee, thy hand under my thigh:

[3]And I will make thee swear by the LORD, the God of heaven, and the God of the earth, that thou shalt not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell:

[4]But thou shalt go unto my country, and to my kindred, and take a wife unto my son Isaac.

[5]And the servant said unto him, Peradventure the woman will not be willing to follow me unto this land: must I needs bring thy son again unto the land from whence thou camest?

[6]And Abraham said unto him, Beware thou that thou bring not my son thither again.

[7]The LORD God of heaven, which took me from my father’s house, and from the land of my kindred, and which spake unto me, and that sware unto me, saying, Unto thy seed will I give this land; he shall send his angel before thee, and thou shalt take a wife unto my son from thence.

‘‘Now let it be that the young woman to whom I say, ‘Please let down your pitcher that I may drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I will also give your camels a drink’ -let her be the one You have appointed for Your servant Isaac. And by this, I will know that You have shown kindness to my master.’’ Genesis 24:14 (NKJV).

INTRODUCTION: Studies have shown lots of breakups in premarital relationships because many of the relationships were accidental rather than intentional. Some started the premarital journey (courtship), without purpose, vision, and adequate guidance from God and good counselors. As a result, the whole experience became moribund.

OPENING PRAYER: Father, help me to be intentional about my relationship

This scripture is a conversation between Abraham and his chief servant on his purposeful plan to get a wife for his son.
i. Abraham is becoming so old and God has blessed him in all things, so he summons his eldest servant Vs 1 & 2.
ii. He makes him swear by the God of heaven and earth not to get a wife for his son among the Canaanite daughters where he dwells V3.
iii. But from ………………………………V4.
iv. .…………………………………………V5.
vi. Abraham prayed that the God of his fathers who had helped him in time past will send his angel ahead and help the servant get a wife for his son, V7.


Question: What does an ideal premarital relationship involve?
1. An ideal premarital relationship/courtship should be made up of two full-grown adults (male and female) who have a vision of establishing a godly home (Gen.2:24).

2. It should be purposeful and not wishy-washy.

3. There is a goal of marriage in sight (Gen.2:18).

4. It should be filled with realistic dreams and not ‘eldorado’ (Gen.24:40).

5. The two of them should take time to build a structure with a good base so they do not major on the minor (Lk.6:48).

6. The two adults should have a good understanding of each other (Prov.24:3).

7. It should be deliberate and pure (Matt. 5:8a; Heb.13:4).

8. It should be well planned with full details of how to move from one point to another (Isa.28:10).

9. It progresses by the day from just seeing each other from a distance to becoming close friends (SOS.1:14).

10. It should be fun-filled and built on trust.

CLASS ACTIVITY 1: Students should discuss other components of an intentional premarital relationship:

Question: What are the benefits?
Answer: The following are some of the numerous benefits of an intentional premarital relationship during courtship:
1. It provides a Solid Marital Foundation: If the relationship is well established or grounded, it will serve as a template for the couple on getting married (Ps.11:3). As a result, any kind of ‘wind’ does not blow the marriage away (Prov.10:25).
2. It makes room for a Direction-Driven relationship: There is a realistic destination in mind. The details of the relationship are known to the two parties involved. They are on the same page (Gen.29:20-21).

3. The relationship will be filled with hope and assurances: It will be devoid of uncertainty and full of realistic expectations and optimism (Gen.29:18).

4. A Progressive and Flourishing adventure will be experienced (Ps.92:12).

5. There will also be Peace and Joy in the relationship: It is void of struggles because there are only two mature adults with positive intentions (Phil.4:7; Gen.24:67).

CLASS ACTIVITY 2: Students should mention the dangers of being unintentional and accidental in premarital relationships.

CONCLUSION: An intentional premarital relationship during courtship ultimately leads to a good and godly marriage.

EVALUATION: What are the benefits of an intentional premarital relationship?

CLOSING PRAYER: Father, please help me to be intentional in my courtship in Jesus' name.

ASSIGNMENT: Mention five key challenges of premarital relationships


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